Casals-Muñoz hit with loan lawsuit

While Hialeah Councilwoman Vivian "I'll notarize that!" Casals-Muñoz has publicly denied any ties to su alcaldito Carlos Hernandez in her re-election campaign, she has openly maintained a beneficial relationship with former Hialeah Mayor Julio Robaina, her one-time brother-in-law, freelance banking business partner and political mentor. Robaina has helped her raise funds and has voiced support in robocalls and radio ads.

Now, as of last week, both Roba-y-na' and Casals-Muñoz are named as third party defendants in a lawsuit that claims they conspired to charge 36 percent interest on a mortgage loan. Florida statute states that anything over 18 percent is usury -- or loansharking -- and, thus, illegal.

Documents obtained by Ladra look like someone kept $7,200. Maybe it was Casals-Muñoz or maybe it was Robaina. Maybe it was a little for both.

The plaintiff is Guillermo "Willy" Zuñiga, a one-time city employee fired by Robaina in 2009, who is supporting and regularly seen standing next to former Mayor Raul Martinez -- who is in a heated race against Hernandez for the mayor's seat.  The lawsuit was filed in Miami-Dade County Court Nov. 8 by attorney, Richard Gross, who also happens to represent Martinez.

The motion claims that the two politicos -- principals of the 1st Hialeah Bank of Julito -- and Robaina's wife Raiza "The Fallgirl" Villacis-Robaina conspired "to charge a criminally usurious interest rate (35.73692%) on the loan to Guillermo Zuñiga by overstating... the amount of funds to be paid to Chase/J.P. Morgan, Zuñiga's first mortgage, as $17,335.4`1 when only $10,037.29, at most, was actually paid... with the balance of $7,298.12  being diverted to the benefit of the schemers: RVR Holdings, Raiza Villacis-Robaina, Julio Robaina, C & M Title, Inc. and Vivian Casals-Muñoz."

Indeed, documents in the court filing obtained by Ladra -- the latest motion to answer a December 2010 lawsuit filed by RVR Holdings after Robaina became a player in a federal investigation -- include a settlement statement that shows $17,335 as "payoff of first mortgage loan" and an Oct. 31 letter from Maria Balignase at JP Morgan that indicates only $9,900 on the mortgage, which brought him current (for monthly payments from Sept. 21, 2006 through Aug. 8, 2007) on his deceased father's house on East 23rd Street, That's not paying it off.

When first questioned about it, Casals-Muñoz -- whose hands trembled as she held the documents Ladra showed her -- said Zuñiga got part of the $17,335 given to him. Later, she had one of her new campaign volunteers -- a driver borrowed from the failed "above the fray" fight by third-place candidate and former Sen. Rudy Garcia -- provideme with a 2007 letter from attorney Marshall Watson, representing Chase, that shows a $17,335 total balance due, including escrow installments, attorney's fees, accumulated late fees and foreclosure closing costs.  But still, how come the settlement statement (shown here) shows the whole $17,335 as payoff of the loan? Hmmmm? And what a coincidence (read: not) that it turns out to be a 36 percent interest -- the same magical number reportedly charged to convicted ponzi schemer Luis Felipe Perez by Hernandez and by Robaina for the loans made to him. And she could not provide any checks or other documents that showed how the wire transfer was made.

"The Grand Jury has this file and the pay-off letter," Casals-Muñoz told me as we chatted about it in her campaign office on West 68th Street Sunday morning. She said she gave investigators "boxes" when they asked her, as owner of C & M Title, for "any documents I had in regards to Julio Robaina, RVR Holdings and Recaredo Gutierrez and Luis Feliple Perez." How many boxes? Two boxes? "Boxes," she said. Ten boxes? Because, you know, it makes a difference. "Boxes," she said again. Why is it so hard to get a straight answer?

The councilwoman could not produce the checks or wire transfer copies for the $17,335, saying again, "that file was given to the Grand Jury" and said she had not been served with the lawsui. But Casals-Muñoz -- who has been implicated in the investigation by witnesses I've spoken to who say she came up during their testimony and by a federal investigator who said "her fingerprints are on everything" -- declined when Ladra offered her a chance to make copies of the documents I have and which she evidently had not seen before. "I don't want to deal with Willy Zuñiga. I want my attorney to deal with Willy Zuñiga," she said. When I asked who her attorney was, she said, "I don't know which attorney I'm going to use." What? Does she have a pool of different attorneys or nobody representing her right now at all?

"They need to produce those checks," Gross told Ladra, adding that the the loan was set up by Julio Robaina through his wife's company. "But Raiza had nothing to do with the loan," Gross said, adding that the $4,150 included in the July 2007 letter was paid by them in February when Robaina advanced him $5,000. "Julio told Zuñiga that Vivian had some of his money and he got it from her," Gross said, adding that the conspirators also put both that East Hialeah property and Zuñiga's own Palm Lakes neighborhood house in the mortage deed without his knowledge.

Casals-Muñoz questioned the timing of the motion and said it was politically motivated. But Ladra -- who everyone knows is Danny's dog -- wonders why she didn't get copies of the documents as soon as it was filed. Or why the motion wasn't filed three weeks ago before the first round.

Now that would have been a smart political move. Nah, this is just the latest twist of the ongoing As Hialeah Churns telenovela.

And Ladra predicts it will play on long after next Tuesday -- with or without political persuasions.

Alcaldito, J Martinez share $ sources

While the Back to the Future crew, under the leadership of former Mayor Raul Martinez, have shunned funds from the maquinita industry, there is one slate mate who has jumped ship: former Mayor Julio Martinez, once a foe now a friend, has taken at least $1,500 from companies with maquinita permits who have also donated to the campaigns of the current and past administration.

But those are not the only contributions Julio "The Replacement" Martinez shares with el alcaldito Carlos Hernandez and former mayor Julio Robaina, who funded a $3.5 million+ bid for the county mayor's job that he lost at the 11th hour. There are contributions from Sergio Pino's companies as well and some of the same construction and management or real estate interests with bundled contributions: $2,000 in 10 $200 checks from Evelio Garcia and family and companies and $2,000 from developer Domingo Pando and his, for example. Benajamin Leon of Leon Medical Centers and his companies and relatives gave at least $1,500 in $500 maximum gifts. There is also $3,000 in six $500 contributions from firefighter locals across the county and their PACs, likely encouraged by the increasingly influential Hialeah fire union, which gave Julio Martinez their endorsement and collected funds for the other Back to the Future friends (but were unpleasantly surprised to hear of his monetary support base).

Julio Martinez's campaign reports are interesting reading. He has a $250 contribution from former Miami City Manager Jose Garcia-Pedrosa and $1,000 from Alex "No Pagues Ese Ticket" Hanna. Most intriguing, however, is a $250 contribution from Re Gu Records, owned by Recaredo Gutierrez, who borrowed money at high interest from former Mayor Alex Penelas, and soon-to-be former alcaldito Carlos Hernandez and Councilwoman Vivian Casals-Muñoz in a shadow banking industry that has been exposed by the media and a self-proclaimed music producer from Las Vegas (read: maquinitas). Gutierrez did not want to talk to Ladra about the loans -- which he is reportedly still making payments on, payments that may not be reported -- and was unhappy I called Wednesday morning. "Frankly, I don't have anything to say about any of this," said Gutierrez, who noted a $50,000 debt to el alcaldito when he claimed bankruptcy (which came out in the Miami Herald's shadow banking story before the mayoral primary). "I am a businessman with a low profile and I don't need to be involved in this. I am not a public person. And I would ask you not to call me again." (But there will be more later anyway.)

Julio Martinez told me, basically, the same thing he told the Miami Herald's editorial board: that maquinita money is as good as any other money."As long as they are legal, I am in favor," Martinez said in a telephone interview Wednesday morning, completely aware that the boss frowns upon the industry. "I don't want Hialeah people to get picked up on buses and taken to the Indians who don't give anything back to Hialeah. When they become illegal, I'll be against them."

As for Gutierrez, Martinez said he knew him only as a maquinita interest (told ya) and didn't know about the West Dade man's loans with Hernandez and Casals-Muñoz. "I didn't know they were in business." He seemed to put little weight on the fact that Gutierrez is also supporting Hernandez's campaign.

While surprised about the contributions from what would seem like tainted sources, the other Martinez shrugged off the seeming conflict of interest. "They know each other from before," he said about Gutierrez. "And Julio is wrong on the maquinitas, but I can't tell him not to accept checks."

Yes, you can. That's why you are the boss. Try it like this: "Hey, blockhead! Stop taking tainted money from the crooks who want to keep el alcaldito in power so they can keep the status quo. You don't need that extra baggage."

Because, Raul, you don't need that extra baggage.

Alcaldito plays with fire, again

We saw this coming. We told everyone that this alarmist threat to fire 105 of 271 firefighter paramedics in Hialeah was blackmail, or extortion (you pick your term), and that the very politicians who proposed it would come in at the 11th hour with a salvation plan or last-minute Holy Mary pass.

But I didn't imagine the scare tactic would be so obviously revealed. Or is it me? You be the judge, dear readers.

On Monday, a day after El Nuevo Herald reporter Enrique Flor published a story based on a source's [conveniently-placed] tip about the city's offer to renew negotiations with the firefighters union, union representatives actually got a letter expressing this offer from City Attorney Bill "Go-Between" Grodnick, who as a legal representative of the city knows that neither the letter nor the deal uttered at a public budget hearing are legitimate or proper offers in the labor bargaining process that has been halted by a declaration of impasse on the city's behalf. Nah. This is obvious campaign strategy. So the city attorney is playing politics now at the behest of su alcaldito Carlos Hernandez while accusing others of doing it (Can he be disbarred for any of this? Where do we complain?). The letter comes two days before the final public hearing where the Seguro Que Yes council is poised to pass a bogus budget that cuts 40 percent of the fire rescue staff and -- again, this is odd for a city official -- whines about not getting calls returned. It's even odder from the city official who prematurely declared impasse less than two hours into the last negotiation session in July. This is becoming a broken record. Union President Mario Pico told Hernandez at the budget hearing that he would meet with him at his earliest convenience. "We can go get a cafecito right now after the meeting," Pico said. "I don't want coffee, Mr. Pico," the mayor said, adding that he preferred to meet the next day. But he never made good on that because by then the TV cameras were gone. So, on Saturday, someone in the administration leaks the story to El Nuevo. On Monday, Grodnick sends the letter with the new offer, which is basically that in exchange for giving up holiday pay for 11 days, they can keep not only the 14 firefighters who would have been fired Oct. 1 but also the nine recruits at the academy that the city has already invested in.

But is it legitimate? Or is it a bait-and-switch hat trick (read: campaign stunt)? Because how can this be a possible solution if the holiday paycut will only save about $1.3 million and the budget, to be balanced, calls for more than $7 million cut from the fire department. Where did the city all of a sudden find another $5.5 million? "I can't give you the details because I was not involved in it. But significant operational and costs savings were made," Grodnick told me on the telephone, in a very proud tone. "We made substantial inroads in savings. Of the $7.5 million, half was saved through cost reductions in other changes." Really? Someone found $5 million worth of "cost reductions" that were not apparent two weeks ago, when su alcaldito threatened to fire 105 firefighters. Or is this offer just for that first phase of the "budget in stages"? Are there still going to be 35 layoffs Dec. 1 and 35 more next year? That was the original plan and it would also serve to delay the overwhelming negative reaction su alcaldito has been getting, even from his supporters, until after Election Day? It would also delay the mandatory return of $1.8 million in federal homeland security grants for minimum staffing until after Election Day. Yes, Grodnick said. Those terminations are still on the table. "We hope to cut the other $3.5 million during the year through concessions in the fire department or further workforce reductions. But we hope and sincerely expect to come to an agreement once we get through the political season," Grodnick told me. Really? I thought this was going on for two and a half years?

This is the longest shell game Ladra has ever watched and this dog is getting dizzy

After I asked for details on these "significant operational savings" (one would think Grodnick could recite one or two if they were so significant), Grodnick told me to call Fire Chief Marco de la Rosa. "I can't talk to you about that. That was done through the fire chief and the OMB [Office of Management and Budget] Director." But the fire chief didn't seem to know about his own amazing "significant cost reductions" that saved his department's positions (at least for now). "I have to see what operational plan he is speaking to," de la Rosa said, buying some time and seemingly satisfied with the city offer (Ladra can't help but wonder if he was the tipster). "It's the same offer made at the council meeting, which was stated publicly." And when asked why savings of $1.3 million are suddenly enough, de la Rosa said "at least the partial costs are deferred through the holidays." He then said he had to get permission from su alcaldito before he could speak with me anymore about the "significant costs savings" in his department's operational plan and the re-organizational structure plan. But he is not, apparently, go-between material like Grodnick: When I called him back about a half an hour later, he told me he had been told not to provide me with any information. "As per direction of the mayor, all budgetary questions are referred to his office," de la Rosa said. I had already left two messages with someone at the mayor's office Monday, as I have done nearly every day in the last two weeks. But I likely will not get a call back. And I may ask him in person when I see him at City Hall, but he will likely ignore me again. So Hernandez won't answer questions and won't allow de la Rosa, Budget Director Alex Vega, Finance Director Vivian Parks or Water and Sewer Director Armando Vidal to clarify questions about the budget. That means that nobody gets to know what we are dealing with. And that's exactly what the fire union is facing and has been facing for two and a half years. No answers to real questions of substance. No checks or balances. (We have filed a public records request, but history has shown us not to hold our breath).

Hernandez does have the time and werewithal, however, to record misleading robocalls paid for by his mayoral campaign account and leave messages for residents sullying Pico's good Winnie-the-Pooh name. He has time to make up outright lies, saying the firefighters want to raise taxes "to protect their juicy benefits." His emphasis, not Ladra's. But the strong mayor (yeah, I did a double-take, too) won't negotiate with them himself. He won't meet cara a cara, at the table with rolled sleeves, ready to do what is necessary. The firefighters, many of whom live in the city and others who have served residents for decades, do not want anyone to raise taxes. In fact, they believe the city does not have to. They just want to stop frivolous spending and corruption. And they know that if the city loses its Class 1 rating, insurance rates could go up and Hernandez can claim no accountability yet again. Su alcaldito is desperate, meanwhile, to keep his $190,000-a-year job ($244,000 if you count his pension, since he is making a campaign issue of it) and has resorted to campaigning against the firefighters because its trendy and he has to rail against someone. He's lost both the TV and radio debates with co-candidates: former State Sen. Rudy Garcia, (R, District 40) and former Mayor Raul Martinez. And he likely fears the planned live radio debate with Pico Wednesday morning on Actualidad Radio (1020 AM) because Pico (who is not a candidate but will still beat su actor alcaldito) brings documents and asks specific questions Hernandez won't or can't answer. Truth is on Mario Pico's side.

But while Hernandez will pontificate perfidiously in public, el alcaldito sends the go-betweens to negotiate his will so he can later claim ignorance when they botch things up -- as they have so many times. Shall we count the ways? The most recent finding of sufficient cause from state regulators came last week and the fire union can file a complaint about what is clearly a premature impasse (the third in this process, which has clearly been prolonged by the city). How can you say it wasn't premature when even you are still willing to negotiate, Bill? Or was that also blackmail and extortion to get the firefighters at the table in a disadvantaged position? Was it extortion when former mayor Julio Robaina tells the union reps (who have it on video) that if they just shut up and bend over, the city will rehire the 16 firefighters that were illegally fired to influence a union vote (the same firefighters that have not been made whole yet even though the city was legally ordered to backpay them for those five months they sat at home and were covered with other staff on overtime)? Because every time su alcaldito and Go-Between Grodnick say it's been two and a half years of negotiations, they forget to say the part about how the city is the one that has thwarted any real dialogue with hostility and heavy-handed tactics. They also forget to add that during that time, they have been found to violate fair labor practices not once, but twice. It's been two and a half years because of them, not because of the firefighters who simply asked to see the books that show the city needs them to sacrifice so that political pals can keep getting juicy no-bid contracts (that emphasis is mine) and cronies who crank it out for their campaigns keep getting "salary adjustments." It's been two and a half years because there is no transparency about the numbers and the figures that are presented change from day to day. It's been two and a half years because city administrators have dug in their heels and won't show their real financials or even present a recovery plan so the community is not faced with this again in 12 and 24 and 36 months.

Thank goodness we have the firefighters answering a different kind of emergency in the city. They are performing a different kind of triage. The victim is the community at large and the sickness is the corruption, lack of transparency and conflicts of interest that spread like cancer at City Hall. Rather than take their medicine to cover up the symptoms, the firefighters want to treat the disease -- perhaps even remove the tumor -- so that the patient can live and thrive again for many more years. They have sacrificed their own time to educate the public and the union leaders have sacrificed their personal lives to defend not just their own, but the entire city, and fight for what's right.

And for this, they are heroes once more.

They are certainly not the politicians that bargain-rate politico pretenders try pathetically to paint them as.

Mayor's lies must be challenged

Let's add another tall tale to the long list of lies Hialeah's alcaldito Carlos Hernandez wants to feed his constituents: The firefighters threatened with mass firings want to raise taxes and won't make a deal.

What a crock from the man they call "the Rock." But get used to it. He is truth challenged. The firefighters fight this emergency with the truth and have been handing out flyers telling residents and business leaders about the mayor's dangerous plan of political retaliation. Alcaldito only has lies to give the hundreds of citizens who have called to demand that he keep the firefighter staff as is.

The mayor's office is actually telling these hundreds of callers to call the fire union instead. "Call Mario Pico," one woman told me when I called, "and ask him why the union does not want to come to an agreement with the city." Other callers are told to call the fire union president, and the mayor's staff provides the phone number, because the firefighters want to raise taxes to preserve their benefits. 

Let's be clear: The firefighters, like Ladra, know that there does not have to be any tax increase because the council is squandering funds elsewhere. Like with no-bid contracts (about $1 million in the last meeting alone), some of which go to companies or people who make campaign contributions. Like the created positions for cronies and lackies, some of which just got "salary adjustments" -- including one mayor's aide that went from $1,776 a month to $2,884 a month. Would the mayor need to raise taxes for these things? The firefighters, like Ladra, know that there do not have to be any new taxes in order to maintain staffing levels where they are, which are already insufficient to cover a city of 220,000 residents that swells to a population of 500,000 during the weekday. This "tax increase" argument is a scare tactic used to bully and smear the firefighters even more.

But su alcaldito has to say that. He has no defense, no excuse for his threat to cut 40 percent of the firefighter paramedic personnel. It is threat and it is extortion because both he and the council president, Isis "Guttermouth Girl" Garcia-Martinez have publicly said that if the union were to make concessions -- not negotiate, but just take the concessions the city wants to force on them -- there would not be anybody fired. Really? Is that even legal? Let's rewind to July 20, when it was the city that declared impasse on the union not even two hours into negotiations. And they had planned it. The impasse document was prepared beforehand and brought into the meeting -- which shows a total lack of good faith. The city went into those negotiations clearly intending to declare impasse (and they will lose again when this is legally brought to the state board that oversees public employee relations).

This is just political payback because the union backed his opponent, former mayor Raul Martinez, in this November election and his mentor/master Julio Robaina's  opponent, Miami-Dade Mayor Carlos Gimenez. Otherwise why would Hernandez distribute an old newspaper article about past hostilities between the firefighters and Martinez at his press conference about the budget? What does that have to do with the 2011-2012 allocation of funds?

By the way, Mayor Gimenez, why are you so silent on this? Won't this affect county services, too? Aren't you representing Hialeah citizens also, Mr. "Mayor for All"? Wasn't this a group that backed you and helped you get elected?

For that matter, where are the other elected leaders that represent and speak for this community? I contacted Miami-Dade Commissioner Esteban Bovo, State Sen. Rene Garcia (R, District 40) and State Rep. Eddy Gonzalez (R, District 102) -- all of them former Hialeah council members who are quite easy to find in the City of Progress during election season -- before the first budget hearing last week and asked if they were going to go. I have yet to hear back from any of them. I guess election season for them is too far off.

So let's call their offices, too, to see what they think.

• Gimenez can be reached at 305-375-5071 or mayor@miamidade.gov
• Garcia can be reached at 305-824-5058 or at 305-364-3100 and his district office is at 3814 W. 12th Ave, just above the campaign office for su alcaldito and the incumbents minus one
• Gonzalez can be reached in Tallahassee at 850-488-1683 or his district office in Hialeah Gardens, 10001 NW 87th Ave., 305-364-3066.
  

Ladra wonders if they will redirect calls to the firefighters or the Hialeah mayor's office, where the blame really lies.

Hialeah's padded, bogus budget

The proposed 2011-2012 Hialeah budget is an almost two inches thick and divided into sections that lay out the plan to operate the city's departments and services with $263.4 million.

But it is so full of holes that it shouldn't weigh as much as it does.

Only about $115.6 million is in the general fund, the rest of that is in capital projects funds ($4.8 million all for Milander Park, which is one improvement plan that has to be audited and/or investigated come Nov. 17), special revenue funds -- grants like Children's Trust and affordable housing, transit monies and fire rescue transportation -- and enterprise funds, like solid waste and the cash cow Water and Sewer, with a $103.4 million budget that the city keeps dipping into to cover expenses, we suspect (more on that later). So let's concentrate for now on the general fund, which is where mayoral stand-in Carlos Hernandez plans to extract close to $7 million from the fire department by firing 105 firefighters and paramedics.

Let's pretend this is not political backlash and retribution for the endorsement of his challenger, former Mayor Raul Martinez, which came one day before the alcaldito announced his plans to cut the fire rescue personnel by 40 percent and distributed a an article of past hostilities between the fire union and the Dark Prince (a bitter pill to swallow for many firefighters who remember the former mayor's hardline with them in his administration). Let's pretend it is not blatant retaliation for the union's consistent legal victories that have found the city time and time again to practice unfair labor laws and which have cost the taxpayers millions of dollars in fines, legal costs and overtime. Let's pretend it is not a pathetic example of blackmail as the council and administration extort the firefighters by saying the terminations could be stopped if they just swallow whatever concessions the mayor demands, rather than sit at a table and, in good faith, find ways to compromise on items that can lead to savings for the taxpayers, as the firefighters have offered. (We really cannot believe this is even legal for them to do this). Let's pretend it is not a campaign ploy in a desperate attempt to keep his $190,000 job and VIP pension -- because the council members get pension, too, and preferential treatment (more on that later).

Let's pretend, also, that any one of those council members actually read the budget and all its glorious chapters and line-by-line itemizations. I say pretend because it is plainly clear that the Seguro Que Yes crew either did not read the budget or did not understand it. And I can understand that. Ladra is not a financial genius by any means, and this budget is not an easy thing to get through (so I cannot imagine either council member Pablito "Huh" Hernandez or Katherine "I sleep here and there" Cue getting the fine details). But there are definitely some questions that council members should have asked if they had been paying any attention to where the budget director, Alex Vega, is hiding the money. Instead, they stare blankly as others ask the questions they should be asking. Like why the budget does not reflect the $10 million that the city has twice been ordered to pay the general employees for a grievance the general employee union won and that the city is still appealing, at more legal costs to taxpayers. It doesn't reflect that almost certain debt. Like why there are more than 32 additional positions (read: ghost workers to pad the budget) budgeted in the water and sewer department? Like why the revenues reflected for monies owed to the city from the county for overpayment on water and sewer fees are zero when there should be revenues there. After Martinez asked about it at the budget hearing , department director Armando Vidal said that he did not know why that line item had a zero. Because it shouldn't be. It was a classic moment that perfectly illustrated how bogus and ridiculously falsified this budget is.

Still, there are more questions that the council should have asked. Especially before they voted to pass a bogus budget that calls for the firing of 105 of 271 firefighter paramedics based on economic hardship that, if you look elsewhere in the budget, doesn't seem to really exist.

Let's start with some positions that we want to know more about before we cut one single first responder from our fire rescue personnel. The "budget in stages" calls for the first 14 to be unemployed as of Oct. 1. They already got their letters from human resources about Sept 30 being their last day. But I found 14 or so other jobs that maybe should be eliminated instead. Maybe these positions are crucial. Maybe they are the botellas that they seem to be. This was admittedly found in a very quick and shallow look at the budget by Ladra, a dog who really doesn't know what she is looking for. And we don't have names attached to the budget, which is a shame since we would really like to know who these people are and what they do. But we will ask.

The director of the department of education and community service, for example, makes $91,000 and a "recreational supervisor" in the same department and a "recreational special programs supervisor" make about $68,000 each. Who are these people and what do they do? And are the two supervising jobs so different that we need two? And then a third, really, if you count "education special programs director" budgeted at $48,800 (there are already two education center directors getting paid a total of $52,000 between them; couldn't they handle "special programs"? Especially when the budget already has a $37,400-a-year "communications and special events supervisor"? And, then, wait, why is there also a "recreation programs supervisor" making $60,000 at the parks and recreation department. Is that different than the "recreational special programs supervisor" in education and community service? Some of these positions seem repetitive. Soon, we are going to need a coordinator to coordinate all these people and their jobs.

There is also a "literacy program director" (I kid you not) with $54,000 a year salary and a "sponsorship coordinator" with a salary of $37,600. The number of "community development representatives" grew from one to four for a combined $91,100. That's three new positions. There is also a "mayor's liaison" with a $38,000 salary -- a new reward, er, I mean position, probably, for either Jonathan Martinez or Arnie Alonso, who each spent much time campaigning for former mayor Julio Robaina's failed county mayoral bid and will likely waste much of their taxpayer-paid time doing the same thing for their new boss -- where 25 percent of the salary comes out four different departments: the code enforcement, occupational license, building and planning and zoning departments. Neither one would tell me when I asked what their new reward jobs were. There's another position, one not budgeted last year, that is paid from two different accounts: a "purchasing/property director" with an $80,000 salary -- 25 percent of which comes out of the office of management and budget and 75 percent of which comes out of "affordable housing fund." Another new position is the building official, a title to which the senior building plan processor was promoted, with a salary of $96,000. This person's former salary in the last position, where he or she was performing these duties, is not listed in the budget because it is eliminated. So, basically, this person was promoted, it seems. Wonder if it was a big raise.

These are great positions to be able to have in a city government, but maybe not at the price of 40 percent of the first responders who safeguard the residents lives for an average of $70,000. I have asked for a finer salary breakdown in the department, as some supporters of this dangerous and absurd proposal to cut two out of every five allegedly overpaid firefighters have suggested, and I expect to get those public records faster than I get most documents that I requested (have waited more than a week to see personnel records for Martinez and Alonso, and I bet that won't come as quickly). But the proposed budget does reflect that the fire chief, who has been awfully silent about this plan to cut 40 percent of his staff, makes $131,000 and the assistant chief make $114,000. Three battalion chiefs make $364,720 between them, so that's about $121,500 each and four division chiefs making about $105,00 each. But none of these top management employees are going to get fired, I bet. Not that they should. These are enviable salaries, sure, but these people are in those positions because they have worked for decades and climbed up the civil ladder and they make policy and operational decisions that affect hundreds of workers and hundreds of thousands of residents. And if we are going to size them up, it would be smart to compare them to, say, the police chief's salary and fire chief salaries across the county and/or state for cities of similar size and population.

And while they seem like very high salaries at first glance, it's not that much when you realize that the mayor makes $190,000 a year to dole out political favors to his campaign contributors and use the office and bully pulpit to campaign for election -- not re-election since he was never elected to this position. It's not that much when you realize that executive salaries in the city clerk's office are projected to rise by $41, 342. Yes, they have a new office coordinator at $35,300 but lost a records manager who makes $35,900 (transferred to the building department for whatever reason). And the department has a new administrative aide for $26,600 but they lost a clerk/typist and a print shop technician. So two new staffers, three other positions gone is a net loss of one position. There should be an overall decrease, no?

There are so many questions about this budget, in fact, that one has to wonder if Vega, the man who wrote it for the mayor and makes $118,000 a year to play a funny money shell game for their political friends and aspirations, is overpaid.

Hialeah: Campaign $ before safety

Hialeah's alcaldito Carlos Hernandez and his yes council would have people believe that they have to fire almost half the city's firefighter paramedics to balance the budget without raising taxes. But a closer look at the city's checkbook may indicate that what they really want is to take money from the fire department budget so they can keep on doling out millions in no-bid contracts and purchase order increases for their friends and campaign contributors.

On the agenda for tonight's meeting, two days before they consider firing 40 percent of the 270 firefighters that currently serve more than 220,000 residents, there are several items that are worth questioning. They include more than a dozen requests to waive the competitive bidding process -- which guarantees fair, not inflated prices, and an open, level playing field -- for a total of more than $800,000, which includes one for Maguire Group for inspections that have already been done on the water pump that cost the city double because it wasn't done right the first time. Maguire Group, its officers and their other companies contributed at least $4,300 to the failed Julio Robaina county mayoral campaign -- and, Ladra is willing to wager, we'll see some contributions to the current candidates on the dais (which is the long podium they sit at for meetings, for that person who did not recognize the word).

Additionally, there is a "change order" for contracts with two other companies (probably no bid contracts, also) that contributed to the Robaina campaign: Acosta Tractors ($175,000) and Overland Carriers (doesn't say how much the change is, but the contract total is $2.1 million so I bet it's at least a six-figure figure). Acosta Tractors and its related officers and companies donated $2,000 in four bundled maximum $500 contributions. Overland just $1,000 that I could find so far, but its harder than it looks to trace these contributions back and connect them to bundles. And I haven't even started to look at the seven or eight PACs that supported Robaina that might have also benefited from these benevolent city vendors.

This is how the city administration misspends your hard-earned taxes, Hialeah. Watch them as they raise no questions and rubber-stamp every no-bid contract and every change order. Council President Isis "Guttergirl" Garcia-Martinez might even give her nod with her signature enthusiastic "Absolutely!" -- just in case there is any question of how she really feels.

Then Thursday, do not let the council blame the city's hard-working employees for their own financial mismanagement and cut half of the city's firefighters and paramedics so that they can keep on doling out funds to their campaign contributors.

That's pathetic. And it should be criminal.

Poll: Hialeah incumbents weak

A poll of 300 Hialeah residents paid for by the city's firefighters union puts former mayor Raul Martinez in the pole position for the mayoral race this November with a double-digit lead over incumbent mayor, Carlos Hernandez. But while former State Sen. Rudy Garcia has been in the number three position before, he is now double-digits behind Hernandez -- who has used the bully pulpit to promote his candidacy through a bunch of obvious campaign initiatives -- according to the poll by the same Freddy Balsera who was paid more than $200,000 for work on the county mayoral campaign of former Hialeah mayor Julio Robaina.

Balsera reportedly only charged $5,000 for the poll for the fire union, who fiercely fought Robaina's mayoral bid and is likely not going to endorse his puppet alcaldito. The union leadership, which released only a one-page summary of the poll and not the questions or the numbers themselves (and, yes, I've asked for more and will press for full disclosure) chose Balsera's firm to give the poll credibility and commissioned it because, contrary to popular belief, not all the union members are as supportive of Martinez as the leadership may seem to be. The fire union screening is next week and the poll was commissioned by the leadership to help with the decision. But Martinez certainly has a few things on his side: He supported Miami-Dade Mayor Carlos Gimenez -- and the firefighters built a rapport working with him on the same side of that -- and his slate has a few fire union friendly candidates, also from Hialeah Team Gimenez, that the anti-incumbent and increasingly influential fire union leadership will likely support. That includes former councilman and housing authority director (until he was fired by Robaina) Alex Morales, who also showed "a commanding lead" in the open seat in this poll after getting high recognition ratings in the poll commissioned last month by Frank Lago, a council candidate and chief of staff to Sweetwater Mayor Manny Marono. This poll says Lago is tied or within the margin of error with incumbent Paul Hernandez, whose seat he is seeking. In fact, all the incumbents are vulnerable and Cindy Miel and Julio Martinez are also tied or within the margin with Council President Isis "Gavelgirl" Garcia-Martinez and Jose Caragol, who they are challenging, respectively. Miel is currently in the seat against Vivian Casals-Munoz with housing authority employee and son of the former chief Danny Bolanos. But Ladra is certain she will switch to rematch Gavelgirl -- and the fact that this poll pit her there instead of with Vivian shows that the fire union or Balsera may have had that inside knowledge.

The glaring omission in the summary is any mention about Bolanos against Casals-Munoz, who was cited as the least favorable incumbent in the Lago poll (which we still want to know how it was paid for). And the reason for that is because Danny Boy, who gets some negative points from past accusations when he was a police officer and his brother's bank robbery conviction, doesn't do too well in this poll. According to people who have seen the numbers, Bolanos has about a 14 percent approval rating or voter support, Ladra is not sure which -- but neither is good. And this is one place Ladra thinks the poll is flawed. And not just because Freddy didn't take Ladra into account, and my anti-incumbent bent is giving Danny his due. But, rather, mostly because we bet the 195 women and 105 men -- 86 percent of which were 56 years old or older -- were not told that Casals-Munoz may have "her fingerprints on everything" that federal investigators are looking at in the Ponzi scheme investigation and the inquiry into Robaina's allegedly questionable loans and business dealings. Even if Vivian-- whose highlights and new hairdo get a thumbs up -- is not eventually implicated officially, some of her role has already been documented. The Miami Herald lists her in an April story about shadow banking allegations against Robaina as one of the creditors who loaned $25,000 to a man that also borrowed more than $1 million from Robaina's partners, Mercy and Rolando and Robertico Blanco. And she is apparently the notary public for most of the Blancos' and Robaina's loans, as well. Ladra is not too sure, but we think that the pending resolution of that federal inquiry will come before November and change that race just a tad. One way or another.

What likely won't change between now and then is the way voters feel about the state of their government. According to the summary released, 65% of those surveyed said the financial condition of the city is either average or poor and 26% cited waste and corruption in government was the top issue followed by property taxes and crime & safety.

Being commissioned by the fire union, there were naturally questions to gauge voters moods toward city employees, who are being blamed for the financial emergency and having contract issues with the administration. "Quality city services" was rated as the fourth most important issue to voters, but the poll doesn't say fourth out of how many. Not surprisingly, 86% of those questioned said the Hialeah firefighters -- who have taken a more visible role in political matters lately after contract negotiations with the former administration basically dissolved -- are doing a a good or excellent job. They are, after all, firefighters. Hello. It's like puppies. Who doesn't love puppies? But, again, what the poll summary does not say is whether those polled were asked if the firefighters were doing a good job saving lives or a good job educating voters and exposing concerns with the current administration's policies and management. Or both.

One thing Ladra would add: They are doing a good or excellent job staying politically relevant. But if they don't show the rest of the poll, it's going to be questioned and misconstrued by their enemies, whose approval rating is not 86 percent. Not even close.

Gonzalez exits mayor's race--for now

Though he has been a non candidate for weeks, State Rep. Eddy Gonzalez formally dropped out of the Hialeah mayoral race Thursday with a statement on his facebook page that took a swipe at the interim incumbent running for re-election.

What it didn't say is that Gonzalez still plans to run for the seat -- in 2013.

But that's what he told Ladra in a candid cellphone chat earlier today -- that he still hoped to run for mayor of Hialeah in two years, which was his original plan anyway before former Hialeah mayor Julio Robaina resigned mid-term to run (unscuccessfully, it turns out) for the county mayor's post. And since Gonzalez may end up running against one of the three current candidates after all, he doesn't want to throw his considerable support behind any of them for this election.

"I don't know that I would have anything to gain from it," Gonzalez said. "Because I may have to run against that person."

He did say he would likely help one candidate in a council race: Incumbent Councilwoman Vivian Casals-Munoz, who may either be defending herself against an indictment or providing testimony by then. "Because she has been helpful to me and has always supported me," he said, adding that she also went out on a limb and supported cigar czar Jose Oliva in the race for the state rep seat in district 110 vacated by Esteban Bovo, now a county commissioner, when the rest of the administration was throwing its support behind Frank Lago, the chief of staff for Sweetwater Mayor Manny Marono, who is now running for a Hialeah council seat. He said the opportunity to serve with Oliva also played into the "tremendously difficult decision."

But despite deep rooted ties with former Hialeah mayor and front-running candidate Raul Martinez -- who he served with during his eight years on the council before he became a state rep -- Gonzalez said he was not going to support his old friend. He says he won't back fellow Republican Rudy Garcia, the former state senator who is also running for mayor, either. And Gonzalez has sat on the sidelines before -- during the 2008 Congressional race between Lincoln Diaz-Balart and Martinez. He couldn't back Martinez because it would be a slap in the face to his party, a decision Martinez never forgave him for, despite the fact that he also refused to back Diaz-Balart out of loyalty for his old friend. "I asked him what my mother's name and my grandmother's name was. He didn't know," Gonzalez said. "I told him 'This guy knows my whole family' and that I couldn't publicly support him. It was a difficult decision because I wanted a Republican there."

One thing is certain: He won't help acting alcaldito Carlos Hernandez. In fact, Gonzalez hinted in his statement that diluting the vote and giving Hernandez a chance at a run-off may have played into his decision. "During a time when the current administration has demagogued the issues, a budget deficit is looming, and our economy is still shaky, I feel a contested primary would be a distraction," Gonzalez wrote (though there may also have been other factors, like maybe a poll showing he had an uphill climb). "While a serious debate about the fiscal condition of our city is needed...the heavy hand of a populist administration will not allow this debate to continue. This special election is slowly but surely focusing on personality clashes, personal agendas and not what is most important for the future of Hialeah."

Gonzalez, 41, had wanted to come back to his hometown because it has been hard to be away from his young family as a father of two young boys and a 2-year-old girl. But he said he had important work to do in Tallahassee as the only senior member of the Dade delegation this year, especially with redistricting on the horizon, and could "better represent my community by remaining in the state capitol," he wrote. "If this were only about me, I would go on...but it has never been about me. I entered this race because I love Hialeah, it is where I was raised and have resided all my life, and more importantly, because it is the place where my children will grow. In this time of fiscal uncertainty, I shall stay the course and continue my growth in the House of Representatives for the well being of our residents and for our beautiful City of Hialeah."

If that wasn't enough of a campaign hint, he ended with this: "I will continue to be involved and work hand and hand with the people of Hialeah towards rebuilding confidence, growth, and stability. A future return to the city I love is still very much alive, as it is a dream I intend to see realized."

He thanked his volunteers and the contributors to the campaign, which had raised more than $130,000 because he had begun in January, before anybody else. He may have to return those funds, however. He is seeking a legal opinion to see if he can keep it open for the 2013 election and open another campaign account for his state house re-election in 2012. If he can't, then he will write each of the donors to see if they will allow him to transfer the funds from one account to the state house campaign account. Most will, Ladra predicts. His supporters want him in office, here, there, anywhere.

But Ladra suggests he sit that 2012 race out if he seriously intends to run for mayor in Hialeah a year later. Why waste the voters' time and patience running for a seat you have no intention of serving out? Find a replacement to groom now. If the simple removal of any perception of conflict of interest doesn't sway you, think practically. Look how that two-month session cramped your campaigning and fund-raising efforts in this trial run, Eddy! Martinez and Garcia both caught up to you easily because you had to lay low and stop campaigning -- actually prohibited from raising funds for more than 50 days -- so you could actually work for a while.

And Ladra has another prediction that will let you go ahead and help your friend, Raul: Martinez may not run again in 2013. Mr. Mayor, who has always had his sights on higher political office, said he wants to just fix the city's financial fiasco, which he is uniquely qualified to do. Then, Ladra says, he will likely take another lick at a federal seat -- or maybe the governor's mansion.

And he can support your bid for mayor. That is, unless Professor Alex Morales runs.

Professor Morales' Tuesday classes

If every Hialeah City Council meeting from now until November is going to turn into a political showdown between incumbent candidates and their climbing competition, well, you know where you'll find Ladra every other Tuesday. This free entertainment is too good to pass up.

Besides, I'd hate to miss it when former councilman, current candidate and Professor-At-Large Alex Morales is thrown out of council chambers. Or arrested.

Yeah, yeah, former mayor Raul Martinez, who is normally the most colorful and quotable guy in the room, any room, took a few jabs at acting alcaldito Carlos Hernandez, who always looks like the cat that ate the canary. The Prince of Darkness asked some questions and raised concerns about a housing project refinancing deal and the $16 million credit line, but it was clearly the professor's domain Tuesday as he turned council chambers into his classroom.

Morales went to the podium at least three times to illustrate how much more he knows about the city's operations, procedures, policies, laws and finances than any of the sitting council members or the strong mayor. He was ready to trip the mayor up on the pension item that would prohibit elected officials to draw pensions while in office while former employees who are elected, like Hernandez -- a onetime cop who draws a $50,000 or so pension -- would not be affected. Or maybe they could be. "It's complicated," City Attorney William Groddnick said, unable to make a summary distinction at the public meeting that was clear to me. Martinez, who is the obvious target of this move, would likely not be affected either, according to a legal opinion from an outside counsel. "I haven't issued an opinion yet but it may not apply retroactively," Groddnick said, apparently conspiring with el alcaldito to drag this out as long as possible. After all, the words "pension reform" -- even when it's pretend pension reform -- is good campaign chatter. Except that Hernandez, as usual, doesn't really know what he's talking about. He once said that his pension was different from Martinez's because he contributed into his. But that's not true. The 7 percent that was taken out of Hernandez's police officer paycheck went to an annuity that was paid to him when he retired. Morales was trying to get Hernandez to make that mistake again so he could embarass him at the public meeting, but Groddnick, who pointed to a 28-year-old policy that was rewritten in 1998, kept answering the questions for him. This seems like a new strategy and Ladra likes it because Groddnick talks openly while Hernandez sits there with a canary-toothed smile, resting his chin on the tip of his index finger.

"Do you think you're going to trap me into something? You're leading me with 100 questions. Get to the point," Groddnick said, adding a little sarcastic emphasis to "Let's be transparent."

Council President Isis "Gavelgirl" Garcia-Martinez -- who did not use the gavel once so I wonder if we should rename her -- had to weigh in, as usual, with her little jab: "And your emails couldn't be more transparent," she told Morales, leaving everyone to wonder what she is talking about and Ladra to make yet another public records request, this time to see what nuggets of knowledge the professor has been imparting on the council against their will. At Tuesday's meeting, the lesson seemed to be about equality -- at least as far as the pension policy. "What's good for the goose is good for the gander," said Morales, who has told Ladra that one of the first things he will do if elected is undo the law he sponsored when he was a councilman that gave the electeds in Hialeah better pension benefits. "It was a mistake," he said, and he said that even before Groddnick started using the ordinance to defend the acting alcaldito's obviously targetted swipe at Martinez, who he once endorsed as a candidate for Congress. The city attorney said Hernandez's move was in line with a 28-year "safety net" policy that he said was undone with a 1998 law (read: mistake).

"I wrote that," Morales said.

"No, I wrote that," a territorial Groddnick said.

"I told you how to write it," Morales countered.

"I wrote the ordinance," Groddnick repeated, apparently enjoying the debte. Maybe he should run for office.

"You wrote it for me. Under my direction," the professor reminded him and I don't think I've ever seen two government guys go at it with such gusto to claim authorship of a "mistake."

Hernandez broke it up and finally came to the defense of his mouthpiece.

"I'll put up with your cheap theatrics and waste three to five minutes... but let's talk about transparency," Hernandez said, and then publicly challenged Morales' residency, saying that not only did he live in Miami Lakes but that he lived in Broward before that and had not lived in Hialeah in 10 years. "You have a very beautiful home in Royal Oaks," the mayor said, and we can't help but wonder if that is first hand knowledge because he drove by to stake it out or something he read in that unreal ragblog that only responds now to these posts.

Morales, who has admitted to moving back to the city specifically so he could run for office, said he was registered to vote at his West 29th Street apartment, where he has been living for more than a year, and reminded the council that he announced his new address to them at a public meeting last year. "You've seen me there. You have me surveilled," he told Hernandez. "You are welcome to drop by and sit outside. I'm not letting you inside." He also called the mayor's bluff about the homestead exemption, which Morales does not claim on his house. The professor then gave el alcaldito a big "F" in research because he had found another Alex Morales and had not bothered to check employee records to find out that his legal first name is Sean. (Morales was director of the Hialeah Housing Authority until former mayor Julio Robaina fired him).

"Well, then your paperwork doesn't have your legal name," Hernandez shot back, calling his residency claim an "insult to the community" and a fraud. "Nobody believes that you live in that one-bedroom apartment and that once a week your wife visits you for fun night," he said.

And just like that he reminded us why Hialeah -- where Councilman Jose Caragol once campaigned with an oral sex slogan -- has an X-rating when it comes to politics.

But the other significance of that is that el acting alcaldito, despite telling folks he doesn't read Political Cortadito, not only follows Ladra but misquotes her. I used "date night" not "fun night," which as has already been established, is every other Tuesday. I was still gloating inwardly when Gavelgirl, who I hope returns to her little hammer habit, told Morales they had "read all about it on Political Cortadito." (Well, we just want to give a shout out to Gavelgirl and any other council members/closet Political Cortadito readers here today. Hello everybody!).

And while it's a shameless, classless statement that involves an obviously patient and highly tolerant woman who has no blame in the professor's planned return to politics, Ladra has to say it's fair play. After all, critics of Hernandez had already started to use the name "Nancy-the-Stripper" (referring to Hernandez's wife) to leave comments on websites and blogs. And what's good for the goose, right professor? See? Ladra learns fast.

That's another reason not to miss these council meetings: Because they have turned into accelerated classes on political posturing. And we have a lot to study before the big test in November.

Hialeah mayor hides behind lies

The plot thickens like un tamal en cazuela on As Hialeah Churns.

When last we left our City of Retrogress, city officials and acting alcaldito Carlos Hernandez -- appointed by the lying, thieving former mayor, a political powerhouse that basically imploded in a battle of good versus evil when he tried to seek a higher office -- had conspired to tarnish the city's brave firefighters in an orchestrated smear campaign worthy of Machiavellian comparisons.

Well, maybe not that last part. Because, really, it's very mediocre, not Machiavellian. It is quite obvious to anyone who can string together the recent spate of strange and peculiar events and official statements that this cannot be a series of coincidences but rather a concerted effort to discredit the firefighters that have repeatedly asked for -- and have repeatedly been denied -- transparency and full financial disclosure from the city before they can relinquish $5 million in arbitrary cuts to benefits they have earned. They must be on to something. And Ladra bets that the mayor did not think we'd be on to him and his step-by-step, color-by-numbers, defamation-for-dummies effort. Oh, but we are, Carlos, we are.

The latest on his discount campaign "to do" list was a letter to the editor in Miami Herald that, at first, really riled me up and made me what I now call "Slick pissed", after one of my favorite handlers whose irate flare-ups are legendary. Because what Hernandez did -- or someone else, since, c'mon, everybody knows he is incapable of writing that letter himself -- was string a bunch of lies and half-truths taken out of context for political gain during an election year and target a 23-year veteran city firefighter whose honesty is unquestionable, whose demeanor is sort of like Winnie the Pooh and who is doing his best -- diplomatically, patiently, fairly -- to represent Hialeah's firefighters/paramedics under the most difficult circumstances.

But then I realized: Fire local union president Mario Pico must be making an impact.

And then I smiled: The interim mayor -- who won't return my calls or see me in his office and who shut down the press conference about the city's finances after I asked (still no answer) how much of the $6 million in the bank was in unencumbered funds not earmarked for specific expenditures and available to the general fund -- has given me yet another opportunity to publicly call his bluff.

Hernandez -- who complains about firefighter salaries while he makes $190,000 a year to waltz in late, take 90-minute lunches, go on the radio two or three times a week and campaign for re-election -- has to make the fire union a target and his short term scapegoat because he cannot engage with the other two candidates in the race, which are both political giants that will crush him. This gives him some busy work to avoid them while he pays "opposition researchers" -- including a former city cop -- to dig dirt on former mayor Raul Martinez and former State Sen. Rudy Garcia and plan his smear campaign against them. At the same time, he can try to deflect responsibility for the financial fiasco. And I say short term because his story -- if he even sticks to it because he flip flops more than his mentor, former mayor and county mayoral loser Julio Robaina -- won't wash for long when the administration is either forced to show its financial cards or replaced, whichever comes first.

Still, make no mistake that this letter -- which has media consultant spin written all over it, such as the use of certain repeated terms to subliminally embed the message -- is an orchestrated campaign to, well, boost the campaign since every poll has Hernandez in a far third position. And he needs all the free advertising he can get since his treasure chest may not be as big as before Robaina's big bust. That's also why he is using the bully pulpit and issuing press releases and media alerts about a redeveloped home for a senior citizen and an evaluation of take-home cars and cutting his salary and having a town hall meeting about cutting his salary (really? is anybody buying this?).

Since the Herald gave him this free advertising space for his campaign (that letter really should have had the paid for by disclaimer), the Hialeah reporters should follow up with Hernandez and take advantage of this chance to show what a hypocritical opportunist he is by askin him to back up the statements in this letter -- which, by the way was sent to the Herald the same day the administration entered into negotiations with the union fully intending to call an impasse, which the union president denounced. (The spin doctor working for him likely had it ready already, to try to pre-empt any complaint Mario would maketo the media). That is not negotiating in good faith, which is no big suprise since the city has lost three or four labor disputes in the past year or two at a cost of millions and millions. In fact, Ladra is quite sure they had already prepared the impasse document before going into the meeting (I think the city attorney brought it into the room with him) and had set the firefighters up a week earlier with a media alert -- a media alert!! -- from the mayor complaining that he had tried five times to get a date for negotiations with the union and had not gotten a response. Not only was this simply not true -- which Mario Pico was able to document, no wonder he's drawn such attention -- but it was also an obvious set up. It is not a common thing -- in fact, I would say it is quite rare, counterproductive and highly suspicious (hellooo?) -- for the mayor to issue an official "media alert" to whine that he could not get the union to talk to him. The union has been trying to talk to him since before he was named interim mayor and, in fact, has had several conversations with him. One of these was in front of TV reporter Jim DeFede and was recorded on video. The firefighters have been wanting to talk for months and were willing to keep talking last week when the city called impasse. Indeed, they are willing to make concessions if they need to preserve the quality of life for the residents they work for and save every day, which is something that the mayor fails to mention. They just don't want to make them in the dark. They have no confidence in the city's numbers. And with good reason. Last year, they were given two different versions of the budget. The official bounded budget. After Robaina illegally fired 17 firefighters, an arbitrator ruled the city had to rehire them and give them backpay because their figures did not support the savings they claimed to make and in fact the action seemed to cause economic hardship. Even a Robaina-for-mayor supporter and forensic auditor said that the books had many discrepancies and errors. And last month, Hernandez flip-flopped on the figures, saying at a press conference that there was a $7.8 million shorfall (blaming the lion's share on firefighters with yet another lie) and then he told reporters days later that there was no deficit (read: the spin doc read him the riot act after the first press conference because every time he says deficit, Martinez climbs).

As for the "such firefighter pay raises" line -- yeah, that's the one -- most of the firefighters have not had a raise since the 3% in 2008 that was the last of a three year increase agreed to in 2006 -- the same year the council members gave themselves a 10 percent increase all at one time. The mayor forgets to mention that, too. The merit increases are given only to the newest employees because it allows the department to offer a lower starting pay and it is in the contract. It could be discussed and negotiated -- negotiated, not just deleted -- at the table if the city had any intention of having any real give and take and not really be looking to just take, take, take. Because the impasse now allows the administration to impose cuts. They did it last year with the employees union. That's what Hernandez means by "absorbed" decreases in his letter. It was also one of the cases in which PERC ruled against the city, which had cut the general employees pay by 27 percent and then made that decrease 17 percent after the PERC ruling. The case is still pending and the city is about to be it with another grievance from the firefighters, if he imposes cuts like I am sure he will. And the city will lose that dispute eventually, as well. But, hey, maybe it's long enough to make payroll and keep the city operating until November.

It's pathetic that Hernandez is allowed this futile attempt to discredit a true public servant who has not once stooped so low during the protracted negotiations the city had no intention of honoring. Let's hope that it backfires on him and costs him votes. Ladra is working on it. Unfortunately, it will also cost the city more in legal feels for lost labor disputes, which is already adding up to millions and millions the mayor simply does not have in the bank.

His letter, however, won't cost Mario Pico one ounce of credibility. If anything, it raises his profile and makes him more relevant in the community.

I'll have to remind Mario to thank the acting mayor next time he sees him.

Morales' Sweet Home Hialeah

Yes, people of Hialeah: Former city councilman and current candidate Alex Morales is your neighbor. He moved back into the city last August, traded his half million Miami Lakes house with a yard and a wife for a one-bedroom apartment across from Tinta Latina Tattoo Studio and next to an abandoned foreclosed office building where the homeless sleep at night. He did this intentionally and solely so he could run for city council in this November's election.

You hear the alarm bells, too? That kind of sacrifice (leaving your home and family) usually means he's either too motivated -- as in up to something -- or he's just the kind of guy Hialeah needs. And, for now at least, Ladra is going with the latter. Why? Not just because the man is brilliant beyond his baffled mad scientist looks, has phonebooks of information in his head, some actual ideas of substance and knows everybody and remembers every little detail about every little minutia of anything -- which makes him a stickler for standard operating procedures, sorely needed in the City of Progress. But also because he is willing to talk openly about it all and answer questions, to pick up the phone or answer voice mail messages in a timely manner, to take the time to explain complicated budget issues without any hesitancy on details, provide me and other journalists with his cellphone number and further resources and, generally, make my life and work easier by giving me access and acting like he has nothing to hide, which usually means someone has nothing to hide. Fellow candidate (or ex-candidate, as it were) Daisy Castellanos, who refused to answer simple questions about her possibly late campaign account until she could have me "verified" (whatever that means), could learn a lesson or two from Candidate Professor, who Ladra has so dubbed because he teaches everyone even when he isn't trying to. And before Won't and other critics begin their ridiculous attempts to crimp my street creds by claiming that I am on the payroll for Morales or former Mayor and current mayoral candidate Raul Martinez or someone else because they talk to her, they ought to actually tell their candidates to try that tactic. By the way, just for context, another candidate outside the Martinez slate I am often accused of working for actually did offer me a job at our very first meeting, which I immediately and pointedly refused, explaining why the offer was inappropriate to someone who should not have needed explaining (and, yes, more on that later). Because as the cohorts who do talk to me at their own risk and often do not appeciate my sarcastic nicknames can recite on cue in unison, nothing is off the record and Ladra will hear anyone out. They, and anyone who reads this, can probably also say that if you run and hide, Ladra will chase. From day one, Morales has been readily available and brutally honest -- even if his natural ease makes him more mal hablado than an East Hialeah towtruck driver. Good thing Ladra speaks East Hialeah towtruck.

"I don't want to be a councilman," said been-there, done-that Morales, who served 11 years with both Martinez and former mayor and recently defeated county mayoral candidate Julio Robaina. "We need to fix this mess," Morales added. "These people have destroyed what it took decades to build. They destroyed Hialeah. I want to help bring it back."

"These people" are the current incumbents. Morales is on the Raul Martinez for Mayor slate that hopes to unseat most if not all the current council members in a November clean sweep. Right now, he is positioned to run for Jose "Pepe" Yedra's termed-out seat in Group 1, likely against Fernando Alvarez, one-time assistant to former Councilwoman Cindy Miel. But Ramon Sicre and Tony Vega have also indicated they will run for that council seat. Ladra thinks that's a total waste of political weight and name recognition. He should take out the Only Mighty Isis "Gavelgirl" Garcia-Martinez. As much as Ladra would love to see a Miel/Gavelgirl rematch (which, by the way, las mismas malas lenguas that are usually right say will happen), it is a far more easy win to pit Morales against, well, anyone in any council group. In fact, Morales is the number two dog on his slate, a virtual shoe-in according to numbers reportedly through the roof in the now-infamous and possibly planted Frank Lago "how's the water?" poll that Ladra still wants a copy of and an answer about who paid for it and how much it cost. In fact, Professor Morales as a running mate could be as good for Martinez as he thinks Mr. Mayor will be for him. Morales is Hialeah as much as Martinez is. A decade and a year on the council, the Hialeah-Miami Lakes High grad was also former director of the Hialeah Housing Authority until Robaina fired him in 2009. Morales has two lawsuits pending -- one against Robaina for slander/libel and one against the housing authority for breach of contract. He was one of the main forces against Robaina's county mayoral drive and has loaned himself $25,000 (he's doing quite well in the private sector) for his council bid. All the viejitos in public housing know Morales and that's good for a couple thousand votes. For more than two decades, his parents have owned a bakery on West 12 Avenue -- that may become a council recall central -- where Morales still works every Wednesday, his large hands making the most delicate of the pastries. That's good for another thousand votes, probably.

In 2008, Morales and his wife went shopping for a new house so they could bring Ada Morales' mother to live with them. "We made an offer on one in Hialeah but I didn't get it," he said. They bought a 3,700-square-foot house in Miami Lakes for $470,000, instead. Morales, who owns three other homes in Miami Gardens that he also does not live in (just in case), did not have any plans to return to politics, he said. And Ladra believes him when he says he can make more money in the private sector, writing grants and working as a housing consultant for municipalities like the city of Tampa. But when the caca started to hit the fan in the city of Hialeah, it naturally drew him back into the political wind. "I could not stand by and let them destroy what it took decades to build," Morales said, referring to the financial questions that have led to acting alcaldito Carlos Hernandez requesting the approval of a $15-million line of credit puportedly for capital projects but, Ladra suspects, truly so the city can make payroll through the rest of the fiscal year.

"I have dedicated my entire life to this city. Do you really think that just because I've slept in Miami Lakes for a couple of years that I was going to forget the decades I spent here? All my life, I've spent all day in Hialeah. I've been a part of this community, this government for 21 years. And I've never seen this government in this condition, this kind of disaster."

But to run for office and make a difference, he had to move back into the city where the requirement for candidates is to be an elector one year prior to the race. Morales lucked out when one of the tenants in an apartment building owned by his parents unwilling vacated the apartment via the hospital. He moved into the second floor, one-bedroom with a window to the alley in August and immediately registered to vote. That's also when he went to a council meeting to announce that he had moved back into the city and was now a resident. Not because he is crazy (although he is, in that brilliant savant way), but because he wanted it on the record because he knew this would be made an issue. Told ya he was smart. He has been investigated. He has investigated people. He is not about to get tripped up on a stupid residency fraud allegation he made an issue of himself in a past election.

Ladra went by his apartment a few times, unexpectedly always. The first two he wasn't there. But neighbor Maximo Romero said Morales already lived in an apartment upstairs when he moved in six months ago. Rosa Vazquez lives next door and sees Morales walk in daily from her kitchen window next to his door. She said he's been living there about a year and took the unit -- the most concealed one on the second floor. "He's very nice and chats with me," said Vazquez, who voted for Robaina and did not even know Morales was going to run for office. "I told him once, 'Oh, I am so bored.' And he said he was going to find me a boyfriend. I said, to go out with y pasear, not to clean and cook for him," she said, adding that she had seen Morales' wife and son there to visit at times. They still live in Miami Lakes, however.

When I caught up with Morales, 44, at the apartment one afternoon, he was wearing shorts, socks and a Miami Dolphins t-shirt but was in a hurry because he had to change for a meeting. The minimalist Ikea furniture looks pretty new but he brought his desk from the house and it was covered with neat stacks of paper: mail, his latest city/campaign work -- including a long list of current and former council members who collected pensions while they served -- and monthly electric and internet service bills, dating back to last year, which he volunteered to show before Ladra asked. There was lots of clothes and shoes in the closet and his bathroom sink had been used that day. Yeah, I went there. Here, too: His freezer was full of Lean Cuisine and all he had were some canned and bottled beverages in the fridge. That's right: I asked him to open the fridge. I have no boundaries when it comes to establishing or exposing candidate residency. That is Ladra's favorite bone. That's why I spoke to Morales' wife, Ada, who found it funny that she would be interviewed about her husband's strange, politically-motivated living arrangements.

"We've been married 21 years. It's not like we're newlyweds," she said, laughing, "Of course I support him and it's what he wants to do." This was a Wednesday: date night. Some weekends, Alex Morales will sleep at the Miami Lakes house. But on Wednesdays, his wife comes to the wannabe bachelor pad for "date night" and reporters and cohorts -- some of whom have been to the apartment -- know not to call.

"You can drive by the Miami Lakes house and see the condition of the landscaping and you can tell I don't live there," Morales offered as further proof. He rolled off all the addresses and told me how to find them in the public records online. Again, not like some people who withhold information like it would hurt them to let it go -- because it probably will.

This post has been brought to you by Won't, Responder and their multiple personalities from the unrealuntruthsofmiami, anti-Ladra blog (yes, I am flattered), who have tried to make the Morales residency an issue by, again, spreading lies and half-truths taken out of context. These people have no other way to campaign. This context has been brought to you by Ladra, who voters can leave watching for residency requirements compliance so they can focus on real issues like where the money is and why police stations and parks have to be closed. She'll keep popping in on Morales from time to time to make sure he still lives there. Because, after all, he talks and answers questions and will provide me with a lead on another story, if there's not one there. And there's not one here. So, Professor Morales, you owe me one.

And please keep a Diet Coke in the fridge for me. You know I'm gonna look.

Candidate spending too early?

One of the people with eyes on the dais at Hialeah City Hall is a former veteran water department employee who has been campaigning and had a pretty big, volunteer t-shirted team and a banner at the city's Fourth of July celebration earlier this month.

But how did Daisy Castellanos pay for those yellow shirts and full-color banner shown in her facebook photo here? Because Ladra will bet her kibble that she had not yet opened a campaign bank account before the Independence Day celebration at Milander Park.

"Why would you want to know? It's public record. You can get it from the city clerk," she told me tonight on the telephone in a short and terse interview.

So it's going to be like that, eh? Apparently, Castellanos went to the Julio Robaina/Carlos Hernandez School of Public Misadminstration. Oh, goody. Ladra was a little bored.

What Castellanos didn't know was that City Clerk David Concepcion and his friendly, dog-loving staff, too, are bored -- of seeing Ladra every day for several days over a three week period throughout the month. I had asked for the documents filed by all candidates several times since July 4 and hers was not among them. Not one single time. I was last there only once this past week and still there were no documents given to me from her campaign. In fact, Concepcion gave me a sheet with all the candidates's group choices and, next to her name in Group 6, the position now held by Hernandez replacement Pablito Hernandez, he has N/A for campaign account documents filed. (Castellanos, who submitted her resume for the position, was reportedly upset that she was passed up for the kid, by the way). And, most importantly, Concepcion confirmed last week, much after the July 4 celebration, that Castellanos still had not sought the required city-stamped forms to take to the bank in order to open a campaign account. That would have turned up in the documents I had requested over and over again.

"So she can't be spending money?"

"She can't be spending campaign money," Concepcion said, because he knows state campaign law (or maybe Alex Morales told him).

Castellanos, a longtime city activist who worked for 20+ years in customer service at the Hialeah Water Department and served on the city's planning and zoning board, told Ladra Friday that she opened her account after the June 30 cut-off date for the last reporting period and did not have to report it in campaign reports due the first week of July. But she would not tell Ladra what date she opened the account and she would not say where, despite that the information would be a public record available Monday at the city clerk's office, which, remember, is where she told me to go. And, as I said, I have been to the city clerk's office and back Even after Castellanos was explained that she can easily show she complied with the law and prove Concepcion mistaken or had another memory lapse (it's happened before) by showing the campaign account form that Ladra will get Monday anyway. She wouldn't. Okay, then, just tell me. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt. When did you open the account? She wouldn't give a ballpark date, which is always a bad sign. And, again, Ladra will bet it's because it was after July 4.

In fact, based on her facebook fundraising event invitations, the kick-off being July 21, and paypal account set up that same week, let's put $100 on Wednesday, July 20. Anybody in?

Oh, wait. I should first, in all fairness, disclose that shortly after our quick and terse chat, someone deleted the 4th of July photograph I had asked her about from the Daisy Castellanos for Hialeah City Council page -- which she better not be paying to administer because I bet it was created before she opened her bank account. That's another bad sign. Good thing I had already downloaded it.

Castellanos would not return follow up phone calls and an email. But Ladra will try to get up early enough to ask her in person tomorrow at the Hialeah Pan American Lions Club's back-to-school drive at Wal-Mart, 5851 N.W. 177 St., in Miami Lakes. Oh, who am I kidding? Someone ask her for me. She posted on facebook that she would be at the event, which is 7 to 11 a.m. and that they could use volunteers. Ironic that she wouldn't volunteer the public information about her run for public office that I am going to get on Monday anyway. Double goody.

"Was it July 3rd? Was it July 20th? Was it yesterday?" I should have knocked on her damn door.

"No, it wasn't yesterday," she said. More training from the JRCH academy and another telltale sign of something's up.

Ladra explained a third or fourth time that it had to be prior to the 4th to even smell legal.

"What difference does it make to you? I don't have to answer your questions," she said, making me really wish I had knocked on her door instead of called. "You can think whatever you want. I'll give you a call tomorrow when I check my calendar. I don't know who you are. After I verify who you are, I will call you tomorrow."

Of course, she wasn't staying on the phone after that to answer who she was gonna check me out with. So that's now the first question the next time Ex-Candidate Castellanos and I chat.

'Cause Ladra already checked her calendar.

Impasse part of campaign game

An anticlimactic impasse declared by Hialeah city officials on the fire union explains some seemingly out-of-nowhere machinations by intern mayor and opportunist bully pulpit candidate Carlos Hernandez, who falsely fingered the firefighters Friday at a staged press conference that should have had a paid political advertisement disclaimer.

The city declared impasse about two hours after labor negotiations began with the fire union -- which has been successfully battling attempts for the last few years to cut firefighters' benefits without showing cause and which had brought a proposal to save $600,000 a year to the table. That's good faith. But the meeting would have probably ended even sooner if not for the reporter or reporters that attended, to the surprise of the city's attorneys who now had to make it look real. Because it was really just more theatrics in another episode of As Hialeah Churns.

That impasse was premeditated, and not just moments before the bargaining session, although Ladra suspects that if someone made a public records request (read: done) for Grodnick's computer history from Wednesday morning, one will find the impasse document created or at least tinkered with before the meeting. But, it's actually been part of the plan since intern mayor Carlos Hernandez and the Three Blind Mice -- Finance Director Vivian Parks, Budget Director Alex Vega and Water and Sewer Director Armando Vidal -- realized just how bad the city's financial crisis is (read: you ain't seen nothin' yet, folks) and decided, more importantly, they had to find someone to blame in the eyes of the voting public in what promises to be a particularly pissy election year.

Enter the increasingly influential firefighters' union. They've been a stubborn thorn in the side of the administration for years, arguably costing one-time county mayoral front-runner Julio Robaina the election, forcing the city to hire back 16 firefighters that were illegally fired by Robaina for political motivations and generally annoying the hell out of city officials with pointed public records requests and demands for financial transparency. So they're perfect scapegoats. Imagine this "mayor's conference room powwow" episode on As Hialeah Churns:

• Hernandez: "The *&^%$#@ firefighters are perfect! Hell, we can turn the other employees against them because they are the only ones who haven't made any &^%$#@ sacrifices." (Whispered: "*&^%$#@ celebrated a^%$#les think they're better than cops.")




• Parks: "Well, sir, actually, and as we have explained to you five or six times each, the firefighters are the only ones we haven't been able to take concessions from."




• Vega: "Yet. But maybe there is a way we might make it happen before the November elections. Maybe." (Inner voice, without his lips moving: "And we can all keep our jobs a little longer.")




• Hernandez (watching a couple lizards go at it on a tree outside the window): "I'm listening."




• Vidal: "Can I have the rest of that sandwich?" (Takes half of Vega's sandwich without waiting for a response).




• Hernandez: "Well, Alex?"




• Vega:"Sure, he can have it."




• Hernandez: "No, your idea to save our jobs."




• Vega: "It's actually Vivian's idea."




• Parks (shakes her head): "Armando told me." (Everyone looks at Vidal, gnawing at the sandwich in oblivion, and then back at Parks with a 'yeah, right' face). "Okay, Bill told me.




• City Attorney William Grodnick, who has been sitting at the end of the table unnoticed: "It's rather easy and genius, if I do say so myself. We declare impasse, no matter what, just declare impasse and then we impose on them whatever cuts we want. To make it more credible, Carlos (and the actor playing Grodnick slows his speech) you will issue a media alert a week or two earlier, next Monday in fact, denouncing the fire union's refusal to respond to our five requests for a meeting to discuss their contract. It's classic media crisis management: We force them to defend themselves. We are the alpha dog."




• Hernandez: "But we did meet. Then I told them to hold off until after the county election."




• 'Grodnick: "Who cares? Who knows that for a fact? They will still be in a defensive mode. And some people will believe it. You are the mayor. Put it out on an official media alert. It's official. The media is lazy and stupid anyway."




• Hernandez: "But the ^&%$#@ bomberos did respond, didn't they? Hey, wait, didn't we even meet with them once?"




• Grodnick: (Sigh) "That's not the point. We put it out with our spin, the TV soundbites and radio briefs will eat it up. People are sick of public employees with fat paychecks." (Under his breath) "As long as it's not public lawyers with fat six-figure paychecks." (Back to his normal voice) "They'll buy this."




• Hernandez: "We're selling something else to make up the budget gap? Great idea!"




• Parks shakes her head.




• Vega slumps his shoulders.




• Vidal freezes in motion momentarily, then pops the last bite of sandwich into his mouth.




• Grodnick: "No, Carlos. Just trust me. Issue the media alert. Then we can agree to a forensic audit, because it will never happen before we declare impasse. Then have a press conference to discuss the city's financial situation, but make sure you blame the firefighters for the bulk of the shortfall. Yeah, that should do it. First, the media alert that puts them on defensive. Second, agree to their demands for transparency, which makes you the good guy. Third, blame them for the shortfall, which makes them the target."

Okay, maybe that's too much creative license. There is no way to know, for sure, if there was a sandwich in the room. But one thing I do know: The firefighters were set up and the impasse was always the city's intention. The media alert sent 10 days earlier to complain about a lack of response smelled fishy from the onset, and Ladra questioned it's motives even then. Especially, since it was easily proven false. Fire Union President Mario Pico, taken by surprise when the media showed him the press release, was able to show emails where he had, indeed, communicated within the dates of the supposed lack of cooperation. And in my two decades of government journalism, I have never seen a city issue an official "media alert" on the labor union's alleged lack of response. Sure, it could happen. I haven't seen it. Is that intended to get a better response? Hardly. It is intended to get media coverage and spin it one way. Because it looks real. But, like the mayor agreeing at last week's council meeting to a forensic audit he never intended to allow, and like the false accusation that $5 million of the $7.8 million shortfall is due to a lack of concessions from the fire union (false because the 2010-2011 budget clearly states that the $5 million in demanded cuts was never factored into the numbers), what we have here is scenery. The backdrop, if you will, for the impasse episode. Not the grand finale, however. That comes next.

Remember at the beginning of the conference room scene, someone said action must be taken before November? That's because of the elections in which Hernandez could lose his $190,000 job. Impasse could allow the mayor to flex his muscles in front of voters by imposing pay cuts on the firefighters, like the 17 percent cuts illegally imposed on the general employees (which was ruled by PERC an unfair labor practice -- surprise, surprise -- and will end up costing the city millions it does not have). That, my dear handlers and fans, is the end game. Why would the city want to do that again? If it's going to be ruled illegal anyway and they'll have to pay more in the end? Maybe 'cause that end could come post election. It only has to look real for a few months.

But the press and the public appear to be on to the city's plans -- especially after Hernandez refused to answer questions about the city's finances at a press conference he announced Thursday for Friday so he could repeat practiced soundbites (read: campaign opportunity) about no tax increases and vague plans to fix city finances -- and have already started to ask more questions.

Let's hope they demand answers and transparency that aren't staged to simply look real.